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Lulu Theories
Our Grief Coping Mechanisms 

We all grieve differently. Our spouse, children, extended family and friends involved in the loss will not deal with it alike. Gretchan and I have had different strengths and weaknesses in this process. However, we did find some mechanisms of coping in common. They are presented here as what we have found, though not always equally usable or as effective for us both. I hope this is of help to some, but if something doesn't click with you, just skip and search for your path. more>>>>
Our Favorite Quotes  
[Spread the Bread -]

[Seeds of Hope -]

[One Bright Star Organization -]

[Camp Angel Wings -

[Athena’s Hope -

[Palmer College of Chiropractic -] Shop Online!

[Smile Boston Project -]

[Lullalee -]

[The Reading Tub -]

[Christine Louise Hohlbaum - Diary of a Mother]

[Reading Rescue-]

[Rainbows -]

[The Compassionate Friends -]

[Massachusetts Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Chlidren (MSPCC) -]

[Maureen Hancock]

[Fable Vision]

[Jordan Rich]


[In-Sight Books -]

Life After Loss Radio Show is a program of the One Bright Star Organization, This weekly program airs on Mondays at 1:35 p.m., C.S.T. (2:33 E.S.T.) on radio KTOE, 1420 a.m,. out of Mankato, Minnesota.

"Just when the caterpillar thought his life was over...he became a butterfly!"

Believing is the only difference between having a broken heart and having your heart broken open.
- Gretchan Pyne

"Where there is love there is life."
- Mohandas Gandhi

"Love is all we have, the only way that each can help the other."
- Euripides

"No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit. "
- Helen Keller

"One way or another, we all have to find what best fosters the flowering of our humanity in this contemporary life, and dedicate ourselves to that."
-Joseph Campbell

"Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up."
- Pablo Picasso

"As a suffering creature, I cannot do without something greater than I -- something that is my life -- the power to create."
Vincent Van Gogh

"A beautiful thing never gives so much pain as does failing to hear and see it."
- Michelangelo

"Blessed are they who see beautiful things in humble places where other people see nothing."
- Camille Pissarro

"It all starts with a child. Children see things so clearly. We get the grayness and they see all the COLORS."
-Gretchan Pyne
Lulu Inspirations
Suggested Reading 
Book Review by Susan Mello Souza Founder of NEASPA Lulu's Rose Colored Glasses by Gretchan Pyne

Lulu’s Rose Colored Glasses is a heart-warming story of how our children can teach us the value of time shared. Being a mother who has lost a child, my heart was completely captivated by Gretchan’s tale of how her little girl, Lulu, turned an ordinary day into an EXTRA-ordinary day. The story begins on a day to which all busy moms can easily relate. You know, the type of day when we let life’s everyday stresses interfere with what’s most important in life - our children. Although mom Gretchan is expressing her feeling of gloominess over a typical gray, Cape Cod day while driving home, Lulu finds her “rose colored glasses” in the back seat and eagerly wants to share her colorful view with her mom. “They’re rosy and round! Oh, Mama, try them on and see. Please try them on and see what I can see!” says Lulu. Mom admits she doesn’t like feeling this way but quickly dismisses Lulu’s idea, just wanting quiet on their ride home. Lulu persists and emerges triumphant, teaching her mom an important life lesson. “Oh, Lulu. Thank you for making me see what you see. I’m so glad to have you here with me...” is part of Mom’s response. You will be pulled into this story by its very cover. Expertly illustrated by Anne Carrozza Remick, one can’t help but to be drawn towards Lulu’s beautiful smiling face. In this case, you CAN judge a book by its cover.

Thank you for your inspiring book and articles.   "A simple book of love written from the heart with a profound message that will touch the heart." Thank you for the copy.   –Dr. John F. Demartini

"You will fall in love with Lulu! Her message of enjoying each day is so important that people should keep a copy of Lulu on their nightstand and begin each day with it!" –Robin Kall from reading with Robin
A New Earth by Ekarht TolleWhat Happy People Know by Dan Baker

Return To Love by Marianne Williamson

Conversations With God by Neale Donald Walsch

Anything ever written by Deepak Chopra!

Big George by James Jennings

Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom

Secrets About Life Every Woman Should Know By Barbara De Angelis

The Secret Life Of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd

Family First: Your Step-By-Step Plan For Creating A Phenomenal Family by Dr. Phil Mcgraw
Letters and Tidbits 

From the Vactican!!
Pope John Paul received "Lulu's Rose Colored Glasses" on March 30, 2005. We hope that Lulu gave him strength in his last moments here on earth. The world will miss you... Heaven is rejoicing!

Good morning!

I am a voracious reader, and have never felt the need to write an author before. But this time, I feel that I must. I read your story recently, and for quite some time, could not collect myself enough to even speak. My husband was greatly concerned as I wept and wept, and he had no idea why. And I was too moved to tell him. Like you, we also have two older boys, and a "surprise" four year old daughter. But unlike you, it seems that I had allowed life in general to get in the way of our family life. We both have extremely busy and stressful careers and sometimes our children and family suffered because of it. We rarely took the time to "smell the roses" or just enjoy our time with each other. Your story has forever changed that. The very evening I read your story, we put some changes in place and are making them a part of our lives. Never again will we take things for granted. I told my husband I received the greatest of wake up calls that night. One evening this week, I found myself slipping and reverting back to old ways, and my husband came up behind me and whispered two words "Remember Lulu" and suddenly my priorities were in place again. I will never forget her story or her bright sunny smile. She was truly a most gorgeous ray of sunshine and it is evident from all the photos how much she was loved. Please know that her death was not in vain, and our family has been changed because you were so gracious to tell her story. We are praying God's blessings upon you.

Joy H.
Gretchen and family,

I first heard of Lulu when I was stationed in Korea 2004-2005 while watching an episode of Good Morning America. I remember crying my eyes out while listening to your story then looking it up on line and seeing adorable Lulu in pictures (warrior princess is my favorite). I ordered the first book and you sent me the sweetest letter to go with it, which I still have. I framed a picture of Lulu and after four assignments (Korea, Fl, Germany and Fl, again) I have that picture on my coffee table today. Every time I see her sweet face I remember how short life can be and to not let things get to me.

I am stationed in Florida now and just got another email from the Lulu website, I am so happy to see you've written more books and have kept the site going, you help more people than you know. I wish you the best and keep up the great work, please let me know if you ever come to Florida to spread Lulu's story.

Good Afternoon,

I order a book from this website Lulu Belles Rose Colored glasses about a little under a year ago, and I have been reading that book to my 3 year old daughter for the past few months. Her face just lights up like its really touching her, and out of all the books I have read to her this one touches her the most. As I was reading it to her last night she asked, Mommy can this girl write more books from heaven, and I lost it that was the most touching thing my daughter has every said to me, so I thought I would write and see if there where going to be any more books like this written?

I would like to give you my deepest regrets on you lost and also thank you very much for making realize that no matter what life throws at us we can still move on and make other peoples life touched at the same time.

Thank you,
Amanda Richardson


Dear Gretchan,

I meant to email you a photo with my little one wearing her rose-colored glasses a long time ago! Here she is, better late than never.

Thank you again for sharing your story.

God bless you and your wonderful family,
Veronica Aguilera


I had written to you recently during a very trying time for my husband and myself. My step-son Christopher died with 2 of his best friends coming home from Spring break a few years ago. Your heartwarming story and "my rose colored glasses " have helped me to remember the happy times with Chris. Well I will be sharing your glasses with a dear friend of mine who lost her daughter in a skiing accident. She was a teacher at Winnacunnet High School. She was so loved by her family and friends, however the loss of this wonderful child is so devastating to her mother. She cannot understand the "Why". Who can? In honor of Shannon Kiernan another pair of rose colored glasses will be shared in order to ease the pain of the loss of a loved one. The message of your little book packs a powerful punch. Our children lived. We need to embrace them, and celebrate their memory.

Thank you,
Judy Williams Healy

Gretchan and Company,

Thank you for the wonderful book! My daughter Angelina will be 7 next week and she has to read a book in front of the class. I told her the story about Lulu, so she will explain to the class after she reads the story. She said she wants to make a tape of the world and tie it to a bunch of balloons to send up to Lulu to watch because I told her how Lulu loved everything around her "the world" she is now reading for practice to my 4 year old they both have their rose colored glasses on. I am so sorry for your loss she looks like a true angel, but look at all the good she is still doing for us here on earth.

God bless you and your family.
Grace Delillo


Good Morning,

I would like to commend you and your family for a WONDERFUL website and tribute to Lulu and for the way you have reached out to touch and teach others about the LOVE of a child. I have a 5 month old baby girl named Sophia who is the light of my life and one true LOVE of my life. I read your story and can't imagine losing Sophia. I can't seem to get LuLu out of my head since my Mom told me your story on Friday night. She ordered 3 books one for herself, me and my sister in hopes to brighten our life a little bit by the amazing light of your LuLu. What an amazing girl you have and an amazing love story to share with the world. Thank you as well for the grief information and the book recommendations as well as the wonderful quotes. I have many of the books you recommend and will begin to read them just because. I of course hope to never endure the pain that you and your husband and family have endured but feel so much strength simply from the words written on the site. Thank you for sharing your pain and your coping skills and most of all your LuLu with all of us. What a gift. A gift that I know I will cherish for the rest of my life and think about when I am a little down. I can't wait to receive your book to read to Sophia and keep as a reminder of a child's love, light and pure joy. Thank you again for your story, my heart breaks and rejoices for you all.

With great appreciation!
Dawn Marie Stager


Dear Gretchen,

We received the book yesterday... WOW! that was fast!! We really enjoyed it, thank you! I have attached pictures of Sienna in her glasses. I can't tell you how much your story has touched me. I had recently decided I was spending too much time on the computer and doing other things that don't really matter and not enough time with my daughter, who is 4. Time is slipping by and I know how fast it goes because she has two brothers that are 17 and 14. I am a stay at home mom and realized I was not spending enough time enjoying my time with Sienna and was trying to change that. When I read your story in the Ladies Home Journal, I was so touched and realized it was just another sign that I need to spend more time enjoying life with my kids and paying attention when they have something to say and taking the time to see the world through rose colored glasses. Thanks so much for sharing your story and for signing the book and adding the personal message on the book mark. You and Lulu are touching so many lives and I hope that gives you some comfort. She has touched the hearts of so many strangers and hopefully made other parents realize life is short and we need to appreciate every second of it! Thank you for touching my life.

Most Sincerely,
Linda Haas


Dear Gretchen,

I just wanted to thank you for getting Lulu's book in the mail so quickly. I received it today and shared it with my daughter. I overheard her later telling her brother that Lulu's mom gave her her new sunglasses. In my thoughts now I've dubbed Lulu "spiritual sunshine" because whenever I think of her I remember to lift my spirits and enjoy the moment. I hope I'm able to instill that gift in my own children.

Thank you again,
Cynthia Lovely

PS... I've attached a picture of my daughter with her new sunglasses.



You inspire me to continue on my path to help families. Also, thank you for the link for In-Sight Books... You are amazing to me... all you have done, self-publishing success and a driven family sharing a message of hope and inspiration for so many.
Warm wishes,
Pam Vetter.


Subject: Story on GMA

Thank you for sharing your story with the world. It sure makes us grateful for what we have in life. I have a daughter who is 3 1/2 and since I saw the story look at her very differently. I realized I was just going thru the motions of a mom. I wasn't really taking the time with her. Life can be so busy and you forget to look at the small things in life. She loves to dance, sing, and perform. I now sit and watch her every waking moment and thank god for her. Thank you again. After sharing the story with my daughter she wants to add Lulu to her nightly prayers. I feel like my grandmother who passed away 2 years ago has a friend in heaven! I plan to make a donation and buy the books in hopes this helps in any way I can.

Kim Whitehurst
Waukesha, WI


Dear Gretchan

Hello- I spoke to you yesterday at the Food Court as you were passing out bookmarks at the Food Court in Rockefeller Center. I hope I did not come across too strongly, but I was truly so excited to bump into you. I had been to Borders last month to see if they could order Lulu's book but did not have any success here in CT. Well, I did not make it to Walden's while you were there as we were going to Radio City, but I went back after the show and was so delighted to see that you had left some autographed copies. I purchased 2—one for my 5-year old granddaughter and one for myself.

I teach Religion to 6th, 7th and 8th graders at St. Joseph School in New London, CT and I often use children's literature for journal entries about seizing opportunities to make a difference in others' lives. Lulu's story speaks volumes about making a conscious choice to see goodness even when surrounded by all those things that often get in our way. But you do have to work at it every day.

I was sincere when I said I think of you and your family often. Ever since I read the article in the Boston Globe shortly after spending 2 weeks on the Cape this summer, to find Lulu's book has been a mission for me. Although I could feel the pain over your loss of your beloved child, I also felt your joy in having known her at all and through your words I felt I knew her, too. I am a better person for hearing your story- somehow it helps me to spend more time on what is really important in life- my family. For at the end of this existence, I know that all that matters is that we were loved and that we loved.

Wishing you and your family and friends many blessings,
Patricia Leroy



I just read your story on the Globe and it touched me profoundly. I have a 7-month old little boy named Sam. My wife and I have gone through some very difficult time in the past year and half. We lost both of her parents to congestive heart failure and ovarian cancer. I loved them very much, and although they were old, it was too soon for them to go. They weren't able to meet their grandson and that is unfair. There are days when we are very sad because the phone is not ringing and the silence seems to loud, yet my wife keeps on going with the courage and happiness of her mom, Sue. Lulu's story is very touching from many angles. Her sweetness is remarkable and your strength very courageous. I cannot begin to think how hard it is for you all, but your willingness to move ahead and honor Lulu's life with yours, is more precious than the her rainbow. When days are gloomy, I always try to put on my colored glasses, now I know who makes them.

Alvaro Tobar
Norfolk, MA

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